Five things which stimulate the desire to kill your flatmates


If you are planning to move in London I’m sure that you are googling from a long to know more about the price for a room either quality of your future life. Wether you are working class probably you are looking for a dime of dozen flat, so you have to prepare your adventure deep in to the wild.

img_5226 A price for a 2/3/4 room flat in 2nd zone in London worth about £1.300 to £3.500 p/m so probably you will have to rent a room from £600 to £900 bills not included. Most of the time your flatmates come from different sides of the world and they will bring with them their style, culture, education and most of the time their rudeness or inability to live without their parents.



In my 4 years in London I moved about 5 times and I had the opportunity to know more about the flatmate-skills so I took out a list of the 5 things which could be happened in your new life and maybe stimulate the desire to kill them.


1 – Pots and plates overwhelmed in the sink.

I’m ready to bet that you will find one of them, London is full of that kind of flatmate.

He back home late, maybe buzzed and after eat something he is too lazy and tired for wash him plates, so he will left everything on the sink. When you will arrive late than him maybe more tired


than him and very hungry you will have to wash all pots and plates to cook something for you. I’m sure that you will wash everything when you will finish your meal. But remember, there will be always someone who back home late than you, he will have his meal and he will be too lazy and tired to wash him plates. So when you will get up in the morning and you would like to have your breakfast before go to work you will find a new mountain of pots and plate overwhelmed on the sink.

Belive me won’t be a good morning.


2- Hairs and yellows on the bathtub.

You are very happy to have your bath, your body is tan by pollution sucked around the city and your skin is smelly and wet by the tube. You have just to take off 5 or 6 empty shampoo jar which are camping on the bathtub and..GOOOSHHH!! one of them was your, you bought it two days before and you haven’t use yet! will wash your hair with the hand soap but just after take off all the hairs, skin-mud and yellows which are laid back on the bathtub..



3 – Who’s aet toilet paper?

It’s time to shit. Your Time Out Magazine is full of news and fresh ideas, he’s your best friend to pass the time sit on the loo. You are planning your next date and looking for a romantic place on the monthly


reviews restaurant, but it’s time to FLOP. All your dreams will flop down too while working hard on toilet-seat jump in your mind your salary, so you decide to get up and…NOOOOO!! Who’s aet toilet paper??



4 – Watch out the clotheshorse!

You are working so hard in London wich your time to wash your clothes is just your day-off. Most of the time your washing-machine will be full of clothes which someone else has forgot inside it from days and probably their smelling-muff. If is not is your lucky day! But remember to face up the 2nd step: The Clotheshorses. img_5231


It is overwhelmed of underwear, t-shirts, socks, towels, jeans,trousers, blankets and linen wich is close to curched in a side and your question will be: Are we renting the clotheorses at all the neighbours?



But you are Mc Giver and nothing is impossible for you. You will lay your jeans on the handrail, the T-shirt to the doors handle, and your socks and underwear on a wire wich you will fix between the wardrobe and the window of your room. Let’s dry!



5 – The bin bag

“What a stink in the kitchen!!”

You’re shout while you’re having your breakfast. A brief inspection is enough to realize which the smelly is coming out from the 50L bin bag beneath the sink. Inside it you could find new mutants come to light during the week by any sort of chicken oddment, pizza, moldy vegetables, tagliatelle, pizza, mashed potatoes, pizza, fruits and expired yoghurt.

As you know London is full of rats, someone say they’re about 60 million and I’m sure one of them is waiting to deep in your bin bag. If you don’t like give him the opportunity for a lunch will be your duty throw the bin bag outside. In the other hand anyone of your flatmates will remember to do it for days.


I think we could write more episode about thousands experiences of every one of you is living in London so why we’ve to stopped at 5? The fact is that my washing machine is ready for me and I can’t lost the opportunity guys. Sorry, I’m running to it!


Are you ready to become a killer?

So what are you waiting, book your flight and welcome in London!



Martino Serra

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